15 Ways You Sabotage Yourself
Sometimes you’ve got to realize the reason you haven’t reached a certain goal isn’t because of other people. It’s because you haven’t found the right opportunities; sometimes, it could just be you sabotaging yourself. Self-sabotage involves you destroying yourself in physical or mental ways, undermining your own abilities. Unfortunately, we often have no idea that we’re doing this to ourselves, so we must take a look at important self-sabotaging behaviors that could be why you aren’t a superstar in your chosen field.
1. YOU EXPECT TO BE GIVEN THINGS
You expect to be given things some of us grew up with our parents offering us the world at every chance. Perhaps you’ve always had everything you wanted at your fingertips without even needing to ask. As calm and stress-free as this might sound, it isn’t how the real world works. In the real world, you have to go after what you want.
Your dreams, aspirations, and goals they’re not suddenly going to become a reality. You have to constantly work toward achieving them. It’s always important to remember that to achieve your goals, you must take active and conscious steps toward them, as this remains the only way to get what you want in this world.
2. YOU PROCRASTINATE
You procrastinate, steal your time, and what’s the one currency you can never recover well? A wise person would say time procrastination tricks you into believing you have more than enough time to complete your tasks, but while you keep pushing the important things off your table, you’re failing to achieve your lifelong goals. Procrastination also affects your reputation.
If the guys at the office know you as someone who never meets the deadline well, there’s a huge chance they won’t be willing to work with you. As a result, you could lose your job, which will drastically affect your finances, so why not train yourself to complete your tasks on time? It’ll save you a whole lot of trouble in several ways.
3. BLAME OTHERS WHEN THINGS GO WRONG
Blaming others when things go wrong, it’s easy to shift the blame. I mean, who wants to be burdened with all that guilt? We have to understand that bad things sometimes happen, and it could be nobody’s fault, or it could be yours. Still, find yourself constantly blaming others when things go wrong.
There might just be a problem somewhere because it could suggest you aren’t taking responsibility for your own actions when you constantly fail to see that you made a mistake and would rather blame somebody else. You’re preventing yourself from learning and moving on from that mistake. You must take time to see how you made an error or how your input could have led to a specific outcome; however, if you fail to do this, you sabotage your chance to learn from the mistake and grow.
4. PICK FIGHTS WITH YOUR FRIENDS
Picking fights with your friends. Did you know that respectably arguing with your friend is a good sign in a relationship the fact you’re friends with someone doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say and expressing your differences isn’t an end to the Friendship; however, if your friends know you as the person who picks a fight with everyone you might be doing yourself a disservice fighting with your friends all the time wouldn’t give you the respect you think they would, in fact, this Behavior would only push them further away from you.
Nobody wants to be around someone who threatens their peace. It’s the same with you. You wouldn’t want to be around someone who’s always looking to pick a fight, right if you tend to pick flights every time you’re with your friends, you can work on yourself by learning again how to react in certain situations and try to understand the stance of others before you start taking things personally it may never even be directed at you.
5. YOU BELIEVE WHAT YOU KNOW IS ENOUGH
You believe what you know is enough. Has ancient philosopher Socrates put it, the only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing. This quote reminds us that we know nothing as humans, and there’s always more to learn. We’re brilliant creatures, which suggests we know something, but living by this quote by Socrates means you’ll always ache to learn something new despite everything you already know.
However, choosing to live by a standard that reiterates that there’s nothing left for you to learn risks limiting your abilities, and if this goes on for a long enough time, you could become stagnant in your life and career without even knowing it pro tip always remind yourself that you know nothing and this will push you to want to learn more.
6. DATE PEOPLE WITH OBVIOUS RED FLAGS
You date people with obvious red flags growing up; there’s a huge chance you heard the phrase Love is Blind whether in a movie, a book, or from a family member who’s cracked the answers to the universe. Still, as you already discovered, love is, in fact, not blind, and this is particularly evident when we talk about red flags. Choosing to be with someone romantically requires that you bear all your flaws to them and that they do the same during this process.
It becomes easy to see if you and this person are a perfect romantic fit or not now. While there’s no manual to falling in love, it becomes important that you leave as soon as you notice any red flags. Don’t console yourself that you’d be able to tolerate this red flag. Someday dating people with obvious red flags does eventually lead to toxic and abusive relationships, which are far harder to walk away from.
7. YOU DON’T EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS
You don’t express your feelings. Being a tough guy isn’t as cool as we used to make it seem. Now we understand that talking about our emotions helps us deal with them better feeling sad; talk about your sadness with someone, and don’t bottle it up with the belief that it will stay buried forever.
Also, bottling your emotions up is one of the various ways you can develop serious mental conditions. Being vulnerable helps you build a stronger bond in your relationships, and it could be a great way to better understand yourself and your emotions.
8. YOU AREN’T HONEST WITH YOUR FRIENDS
You aren’t honest with your friends. Three great friendship thrives on honesty. If you’re being dishonest to your friends, you risk losing them forever. Nobody enjoys being in a friendship where they’re constantly lied to. Not only would it make them feel unimportant, but it would also give them a terrible impression about you, and in the long run, your friends leaving due to your dishonesty will have a negative toll on you too.
9. CHOOSING TO WALK AWAY WHEN THINGS GET DIFFICULT
Choosing to walk away when things get difficult. Take a second to imagine yourself on a Bed of Roses without any worry in the world, with everything you ever wanted at your disposal. That would be great, right? Unfortunately, the reality of living is a far cry from this dream challenges are an integral part of our lives.
They prepare us for adult life as teenagers and also help us become better versions of our adult selves; however, if you run and hide every time you face a challenge, you’re self-sabotaging your potential it could be that you break up with your romantic Partners right after every fight or you resign from every job as soon as you face a challenge. While these might not be your fault, it could also be your fear of criticism and doubts about your own potential causing you to run every time things get tough.
10. REFUSAL TO WORK TOWARDS YOUR GOALS
Refusal to work toward your goals. Most people give up on their goals because they’re scared of failure. They reassure themselves, saying it probably wouldn’t have turned out great anyway, but how do you know that if you never tried, you are defined by your dreams and aspirations so abandoning them is similar to giving up on yourself how would you feel if you learned that A friend gave up on a dream they talked about since they were a little kid you’d feel devastated for them right well that’s exactly how the world would feel if you give up on yourself.
11. PEOPLE PLEASING
People-pleasing trying to please people always wouldn’t earn you the respect you deserve; instead, they would believe they can manipulate and control you to do their will. Also, people-pleasing isn’t simply about being too nice to everyone. It also includes having no healthy boundaries allowing the negative behavior of others, letting others control your actions, rarely expressing how you feel, saying yes when you really want to say no and vice versa, and wanting everyone to like you or even taking offense when someone doesn’t agree with you you obviously can’t be friends with everyone so why even bother.
Depending on what you’re addicted to, addictions could affect your mental and physical health. Suppose you find yourself smoking several packs of cigarettes every day. In that case, you are putting your health in danger addiction to pornography and masturbation can also affect your relationships with your partner, while addictions to gambling can ruin your finances; consequently, these addictions will begin to affect your personal life, preventing you from doing the important things at the right time.
Furthermore, a person can also get addicted to being in control, making it hard to work with others to deal with your addiction. You can begin by changing your environment while also learning to distract yourself. You must identify what your triggers are. Are you more likely to gamble after drinking at the bar? Why not take a few weeks off drinking, or do you tend to watch pornography when bored? Make a conscious f effort to distract yourself with a different activity, and it might just do the trick.
13. AVOIDING COMMITMENT
Let’s face it, commitment can be scary. What if things don’t work out? What would happen to your investment in that relationship or job these years? You may have seen several relationships crumble before your eyes, maybe even that of your parents, which makes it quite hard for you to commit to anyone. You might have grown up with a sentiment that relationships never work out no matter how much effort is put in.
Still, this fear of commitment can subsequently push you to start unnecessary fights or act emotionally unavailable towards your partner. Eventually, you will realize that you’re constantly involved in unproductive, toxic, brief relationships. Understand that healthy relationships are possible, but if it, unfortunately, doesn’t go as planned, remind yourself that you are strong enough to feel whatever pain comes after.
14. SELF CRITICISM
How you expect to achieve your goals when you don’t even believe that you can believe in yourself is the first Assurance you need to overcome obstacles. This belief compels you to push yourself beyond your limits and insecurities. While it’s important to analyze yourself and your actions at every chance criticizing yourself too harshly will only contribute to weakening your self-esteem.
As humans, we sometimes take pride in being an overthinker. We say I already imagined the worst, so I don’t feel so bad it didn’t work out. Being an overthinker means you probably envisioned the worst. Still, while this makes the blow of rejection easier to deal with, it adversely affects your mental and physical health. Repeatedly overthinking over time can affect.
How you see the world can make you develop a pessimistic outlook toward life, which, on the other hand, will prevent you from making important life decisions. Of course, this can also lead to depressive episodes and anxiety, which are only a few steps away from chronic mental health conditions, so how can you beat this stop stressing over the little things, let go of the things you can’t change, and focus on the things you can you’ve got dreams to achieve Alexa and there you have it.
15 behaviors that could be the reason for your setbacks but now aren’t the time to sell. Can you be upset about your self-sabotage? This is actually a chance for you to make active changes. It’s time for you to live your life with more intentionality, break free from that yoke of self-pity and fly free like a bird you deserve to see the sky.
Frequently asked questions
What are examples of self-sabotaging?
A good example of self-sabotage that is conscious is the decision to eat a cake even though the goal is to eat healthy. Unconscious self-sabotage occurs when a goal or value is questioned however it is not recognized at first.
What causes self-sabotaging behavior?
One of the main motives people self-sabotage is insecurity about their self-worth . It can be due to a variety of reasons, but the consequences are similar: feeling of being unworthy or inadequate or the notion that you’re not worthy of your success, or even self-doubt.
What is self-sabotaging behavior?
Self-sabotage happens when individuals hinder their own personal success. When individuals take these destructive actions, their destructive actions can have a negative impact on the entirety of their lives, including their relationships and careers.
How do you stop sabotaging yourself?
There are 8 ways to avoid self-sabotage:
1. Enhance Your Self-Awareness.
2. Take a Look Before Leap.
3. Set a meaningful goal and then pair them with an action plan.
4. Make small changes.
5. Befriend You.
6. Be aware of your strengths and embrace them.
7. Practice Mindfulness.
8. Get in touch with a mental health Therapist.